Archive

Archive for January, 2012

#bassackwards

January 27, 2012 Leave a comment

Quick pop quiz: What is the last day of January? Before you answer, let me throw a wrench into the gears of your brain (not literally, that’d be murder). We westerners use what is formally known as the Gregorian calendar introduced by Pope Gregory XIII. But there are also—for instance—lunar calendars not unlike the Chinese Calendar; they celebrated their new year (based on movements of the moon) on January 23rd. Also, #2012 is a leap year; this in addition to the whole Mayan Calendar thing makes for a pretty confusing monthly lineup. You have heard that the last day of January is January 31st, but I tell you it is not. So then I ask you again: What is the last day of January?

The answer is Friday January 27th. Why you ask? Well that is the day of the #Hashtagfairytales #TweetoftheMonth, and we all know that once the #TweetoftheMonth is posted, the month is over. Now don’t get me wrong, I do not mean to imply that #Hashtagfairytales dictates time, space, and the revolution of the globe…wait no, that’s exactly what I’m implying. I mean, what better way to mark the end of your month? That little calendar at the beginning of a Moleskin notebook? A number in a 1”x2” box on a calendar with a kitten that says, “Hang in there?” I say use #HTFT! The only problem with that suggestion is that I never wrote one for last month, so according to that theory, we’re still in December. So never mind, just stick with the calendar. But nevertheless #hashheads, it is time for the #TweetoftheMonth!

January 2012:

#████████- When I first saw the hashtag #StopSOPA, I thought, “What’s with Twitters vendetta against soup all of a sudden?” SOPA and PIPA. At one time these two words meant “soup” in Spanish, and Kate Middletons sister respectively. During January they took on a whole new meaning. The Stop Online Privacy Act and the Protect IP Acts are long and complicated documents that deal with protecting intellectual property. They likely have a few valid points, but taken to their logical end, they could very well censor the internet; the information super highway. You might see  certain pages with information blacked out, or whole websites blocked and I don’t think that is very American at all. This is why on January 18th if you dropped by #HTFT or several smaller, less popular sites like Google or Wikipedia you saw a blacked out page in protest of these two proposed congressional acts. I mean, to be objective, if our lawmakers used common sense and self-control with SOPA and PIPA, they could indeed protect intellectual property…but this is America; we know nothing about common sense and self-control! The only American who knew anything about common sense was T-Pain…and no I don’t mean that auto-tune, “I’m on a boat” rapper guy; you #ThomasPaine fans know what’s up.

#needssomebutter- If when you saw that hashtag you immediately thought of Paula Deen, it shouldn’t surprise you that Deen announced this month that she has type 2 diabetes. #areyouseriousbro? In other news Snooki announced that she is not a virgin and Homer Simpson revealed that he is a cartoon (#captainobvious). I don’t mean at all to make light of the difficult illness; diabetes is a tough thing for all of its sufferers, but I once saw Paula Deen wrap a duck inside of a chicken and then wrap that chicken inside of a turkey! I wanted that dish—or that flock of dishes as it were—so much! I have tons of respect for Miss Paula Deen and she seems like a nice lady, but her eating habits were terrible. I did say “were.” Deen was diagnosed 2 years ago, she has been eating more healthy since then. Her announcement was not a story of gluttony gone awry, but one of a woman redeemed. Her story is not a cautionary tale for bad eaters, but an inspirational tale to those afflicted with this disease…wait a minute, what is this? The inspirational moment? Screw that, I’m moving on.

(Note: The next two sections are concerning sports, so viewers of Rosie O’Donnell’s show and general fans of Ryan Seacrest, you might wanna look away)

#goodluckchuck- The Broncos and Tim “3:16” Tebow are not going to the Super Bowl, and it’s because of me. I took away what seemed to be their good luck charm. I have a co-worker who is from Denver but moved away about a decade ago.; she used to be into sports but has since stopped following. Given all of the hype about Tebow-mania I struck up a conversation with her. I then found out that she had no idea who Tim Tebow was! Luckily I had gotten to her a few days before she was due to go back home for a trip. She learned all about Tim Tebow and his face paint, and went home the weekend of the Broncos/Patriots game…whoops. She was so into it and as soon as she knew of the trend, it immediately gave up the ghost. Sorry Tebow-maniacs (aka #focusonthefamily). But you’re welcome Patriots fans.

#topsyturvy- The sports world is all #bassackwards right now! First, the 9-7 New York Giants beat the Super Bowl XLV Champions, the Green Bay Packers. #Seriously?! The Pac had that game in the bag…until of course the game happened. Then just days later the NBA was all “turnt around” when the LA Clippers beat the 2011 NBA Champs, the Dallas Mavericks. That just doesn’t make sense. The Clippers—who are nigh synonymous with failure—beat Dirk “the jolly green giant” Nowitzki and Jason “I’m from the Bay Area” Kidd? #ridonkulous. Lastly we have the #49ers. Born and raised in Oakland, I am a Raiders fan, don’t get me wrong, but (unlike most Raiders fans) I still have love for my boys across the bay (#poorchoiceofwords). Kyle Williams must be going over the January 22nd game with the Giants over and over in his head. He fumbled. Everyone does  it, but it earned him angry fans and crying angels (at least as a Bay area resident, I assume the angels are crying) Williams sank into the sports abyss along with Bill Buckner and the XFL (#badmoveMcMahon). Part of me deeply wishes to extend grace, but the other part of me is a Raider fan, so I think I’ll riot instead.

Friends, I know that lots more happened this month: A Cruise-liner sank…just before the re-release of Titanic; Ok James Cameron, the product placement has to stop somewhere. Etta James and Joe Paterno passed away, not together or anything; I don’t want to start any post-mortem rumors. But these two were legends of their crafts and will be missed. The Queen of Soul Aretha Franklin must have Kim Kardashian as a counselor; after only 20 days Franklin broke off her engagement to Willie Wilkerson. This is appalling! I can’t believe that she wou…wait, Aretha Wilkerson? Never mind, I don’t blame her! Also Miss Wisconsin won the Miss America pageant so…umm…free cheese? I guess I don’t care either.

“January 2012: #StopSOPA; RIP Etta & JoePa; bye Tebow-mania; hello Superbowl; Oscar yawns; cruise fail; Republican debates! #TweetoftheMonth”

(All this and there’s still four days left?! I need some time to just relax and play a game…#SettlersofCatan anyone?)

#fiveguys

January 20, 2012 2 comments

I found this great new TV show! It’s really funny and I hope I can recommend it to you all. There are a few interesting main characters; #fiveguys (not related to the delicious East coast-based restaurant chain): First there’s the good little boy who is geeky and essentially unpopular, he seems like the safe guy, but this guy has a few shining moments if you watch closely enough. Then there’s the jock, he’s burly, fairly good looking and is just about “getting’ things done;” you’re only watching him hoping he puts his foot in his mouth (I think he quit the show recently).

Then you’ve got the guy who’s popular but no one really knows why; sure he’s the most handsome of the group, but there’s not a whole lot of substance; truly HE is the safe guy. Then there’s the tried and true guy who no one listens too; he’s been around so long it’s like his voice is white noise. Lastly, there is the older guy of the crew who could give a damn what anyone else thinks, he is who he is and he says what he wants, what he says might offend worse than the jock, difference is: he doesn’t care!

That’s right, this week on #Hashtagfairytales we are talking about the Republican Presidential primary debates. The five guys are—in order—Senator Rick Santorum, Governor Rick Perry, Governor Mitt Romney, Former Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich, and Congressman Ron Paul. These guys are just fun to watch! Let me say up front two things: first, this criticism comes from a registered voter. This is important. If you are of voting age and are not registered to vote, you may not complain; it is just that plain and simple. Second, I am non-partisan. If the platform is correct and the atmosphere and the core of our nation could thrive with any candidate, that one gets my vote. I agree with the Democrats on some things, and with the Republicans on some others. I think voting only along party lines is dangerous as “group-think” gets us nowhere; so this criticism comes not from a cynic, but from a voter looking for answers.

Having said that, these guys are friggin’ ridiculous. At this particular point I can’t see any of these guys beating the incumbent, President Obama. This past Thursday, Obama sang a line from an Al Green  song on stage at the Apollo theater! This is real f’n life man, who has #presidentialswagger like that? Mitt Romney? Nope. Newt Gingrich? Certainly not! Any of these guys who don’t get the nomination could have a great career in comedy. Rick Perry could play himself on an episode of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Rick Santorum could get a show on Fox News…it worked for Mike Huckabee. Come with me #hashheads as we explore each of these #fiveguys.

#Saintorum– That’s not a misspelling, this guy is a saint. He’s nice enough anyway. That isn’t to say he hasn’t gone on his share of attacks, but he’s just so clean cut! Rick Santorum is like the Anthony Michael Hall of the Republicans. I don’t mean Dead Zone star, Dark Knight cameo, “cool” #AMH, I’m talking #JohnHughes era, retainer wearing, “panty-raiding,” #AMH! Not that Santorum goes on panty-raids, but you get the picture. He’s nice, he’s safe, he’s blah. I have to commend him for going this far, I used to be on his email mailing list and some of the stuff seemed desperate, but he is doing good work so far. A run-off between he and Obama would be Chocolate vs. Vanilla taken to its extreme end. Santorum, thanks for showing up; it turns out you won Iowa, and you’ve got lots of evangelicals behind you, but I’m not sure about candidacy.

#Perrymore– Rick Perry. This good ol’ boy dropped out of the race as of this past Thursday. I miss him already, the debates aren’t the same without him! I mean I don’t miss him as much as Pokemon quoting, Mr. 9-9-9 himself: Herman Cain, but I miss him. Texas is like a whole different world; it has its own culture. Perry wasn’t really “southern,” or “western,” or anything. He was balls-to-the-wall Governor Rick “I don’t care if I mess up a guy’s name or if I sound intoxicated on camera cuz I’m from the great state of Texas” Perry. When Perry dropped out he gave his endorsement to Newt Gingrich. Dropping out and endorsing is an interesting concept I think, “I know you won’t really vote for me because you don’t agree with all of my opinions, but my opinion is that you should vote for that guy!” Good call Governor; best of luck in your future endeavors (#JohnLaurinaitis)!

#Mittens– Mitt is not Romneys first name, it’s Willard; but a recent poll showed that some Americans actually thought Mitt was simply short for Mittens. Mittens Romney. I’d go with it. It’s the only thing interesting about the guy, other than his magical Mormon underbreeches! One of the main things that I think hurts Mitt (that even hurt him in 2008) is his Mormon faith. The Republican party has many Evangelical Christians that are a bit uncomfortable with Mormonism. Romney is pretty plain himself though, this guy is really just as plain as Santorum at his core, but he has a little bit more personality. He’s got the look, the smile, and the questionably attained money; sounds like a President to me.

#EyeofNewt– Too easy to make a “You’re a mean one Mr. Gingrinch*” joke, so I’ll steer clear. This man is a long-standing Republican. A True Republican, and in many polls he is 4th. Figures, you give the people what they truly do want and they think they want someone else (I’m looking at you #Barabbas?) (#newtestamenthumor). If I were a Republican this is the guy I would want. At Thursdays debate, John King Lit a fire under him at the beginning and I think he handled it with prowess and grace. He has been a steady, tried and true pillar in the Republican Party for decades and I don’t think he gets the credit he deserves—mainly because he says offensive things and is generally out of touch with real humans—but he is a good Republican any old way! He’s funny looking, has a weird name, has always been largely unpopular, looks a bit like the Republican mascot, but he says good things.

*spelled this way on purpose

#Paulbearer– This is not a reference to the #oldschool wrestling manager character, but is a reference to Ron Paul being old. I of course wish him the best of health and I pray that I am as spry as he when I am 76, but he is old! That guy doesn’t care anymore, he’s paid his dues. Unabashed and unashamed; I wish I could carry a mini Ron Paul with me wherever I go. I assume most of these debates are past his bed time which is why he often comes across as impatient, cranky, and unaware of his general current surroundings. Ron Paul is to politics what Bernie Mac was to comedy; they say the extreme things that many people think but are too afraid to say. If the McCain/Obama election was about age versus youth, imagine what an Obama/Paul race would look like. Ronnie would be 77 at election time; he’s great, but not exactly the poster child for new hotness (#MIB).

Friends, I have to say this: no matter affiliations, morals, or policies, if I had the chance, I would buy a Newt Gingrich AND a Ron Paul bobblehead doll; I had to get that off my chest! I am not taking a political stance and am definitely not telling you who to vote for in November—plus, I’m sure we’ll talk more about this down the line—I just want you to take a real look at the #fiveguys (four now). Scrutinize their policies, defend their beliefs, make fun of their responses, write a blog about their redeeming qualities, hoist the sails, batten down the hatches, it’s all up to you! If you haven’t, register to vote; and if you haven’t, take an interest.

(Seriously, if you know where to get a two-pack Gingrich/Paul bobblehead, I’m in!)

#FinishList

January 13, 2012 6 comments

Let me just say now: if you read this episode, I would like for you to comment. Sure, you can high-tail it out now before it gets awkward, but once you get down to the end there’s no turning back, I’m gonna want you to respond. Remember this blog isn’t mine, it’s yours; I only provide a launching point. If you don’t comment, this might as well be a blank page (#guilttrip). Nevertheless, on with the show: Last week, you’ll remember that I used a plethora of exclamation points (23 according to The Shepherdess), also you’ll remember that I vowed to finish things that I start. Well, in addition, I have resolved to start some things that I believe I ought to be doing. I noted that I would state my inspiration for these things later; #hashheads, now is that time.

Author, blogger, and straight up gangsta Jon Acuff has dared people to finish things in this the 2,012th year of our Lord. Some of you may not know this, but it’s difficult for me to pass on a dare. That’s why I got into a car race with my friend Needles and ended up breaking my hand, ending my music career, and wrecking a Rolls Royce, thereby tremendously altering my future with my wife Jennifer in the year 2015…wait, that was either me or Marty McFly; our lives are so similar (#BacktotheFuture). Either way, I took Acuff up on his dare and began this thing that he calls #FinishYear. This year I will finish things. No choice. No joke. That’s just it.

Mind you, this #Finish Year is not about resolutions, it’s about setting goals and finishing them. This is what I urge you to; That Acuff fella dared me, and I dare you. You’ve got to start out with a clear list of things you want to do. I’m not talking things like “Lose weight” and “Read more;” I promise if things like that make your list, you won’t be reading more by the end of the year and you’ll have lost a few pounds and gained them back. We are talking #FinishYear here guys, we need specific goals; litmus tests by which we can gauge whether or not we are completing goals.

Friends, you’ll want to join with me in this one. Don’t make resolutions; #hashheads don’t make resolutions, we #finish things. Let’s work this out together. What goes on a #FinishList and why does it go there? I want to share with you all my #FinishList; and for the @MarcoAmbriz’s among us, let me give you four qualities of the #FinishList:

  1. Sharing things to finish will keep us accountable; community is a great place to finish;
  2. Some things on my list may remind you of things to put on your list;
  3. These aren’t goals that are “end all and be all;” once I finish one thing, I can add something else;
  4. We can do it, we can make it, and we will finish.

So today on #Hashtagfairytales, allow me to share with you (and possibly spur you on toward) a #FinishList. When making a #FinishList, we aren’t simply writing in the notes app of our iPhones or just tweeting our goals, sure we may do that too, but that is hardly our #FinishLine. We are talking something that most of us are not very used to doing; something many of us have likely not done for a long time. That’s right folks; we are talking about putting pen to paper. When you make your list, don’t make it like a text message or like something you do all day long; it needs to be different and personal; it needs to be hand written.

So, here is my handwritten list of things that I will #finish in #2012:

  1. #Word- I don’t read my Bible enough. Bottom line. My goal here is to read it daily. I need some VidaLife Oakland “B90X” and I may get o that kind of spiritual strength training, but I have started with an attainable goal of simply reading daily.
  2. #rightontopofthatRose– I want to pray the Rosary. I’m not Catholic, but I think it will help me focus my prayers. When I pray “freestyle” I begin by praying for a friends cousins rough pregnancy, and I end up thinking about what age a boy should start peeing standing up; I need the focus.
  3. #DearDiary– The above photo is from my Moleskin journal. There is a separate book for each month and they are pocket sized so I can journal throughout the day. I typically journal about the scripture I have read (#twobirdsonestone). It is very useful and as you can see on the bottom of the page, it recognizes me as a Legend.
  4. #weightaminute– I’m fat. Not “Comic Book Guy” from The Simpsons fat, more like Jonah Hill in Moneyball fat…except taller. That is not to say I only need to lose 20 pounds; I need to lose much more, but I set this goal because I want to #finish. Once I do, I can set a new goal.
  5. #SCLStuff Christians Like—the blog that initially brought attention to Acuff—offers an opportunity for Guest bloggers each Friday. Last year I submitted two, but neither made it; they were both funny, one was safe with no real point, the other had a point but pushed wrong boundaries. But #2012 will be different. Why? Well, now it’s on a list.
  6. #chaching– During 2011 I found a bit of Financial Peace thanks to #DaveRamsey and I paid off some bills. I paid off James Logan (my 2001 Passat) for instance, but #2012 is a year of saving. Once again, I don’t want what’s written to be THE goal, but something I will #finish.
  7. #GoZags– I started to get a Masters Degree in Communication and Leadership from Gonzaga University. I did not keep myself disciplined and I took some time off. “Some time” turned into a year, and it would be all too easy to let “some time” turn into five years; that’s not ok. Lookout Jesuits, Jacob C. Howard is coming back!

I’d love to say that once you make a list that tough part is over; you identified goals and that’s ¾ of the problem. But I’d also like to tell you that once James Logan hits 88mph we can go to Hill Valley 1955. Both are untrue, however give me some time on the second one. Make a list, it’s easy; what have you got to lose (or as I misspelled it in my list: “loose”). It’s #FinishYear, big or small we all have goals. I can only give you the encouragement of two ancient sage philosophers. It’s advice from two men who listened to real people and gave real useful advice; men who live on in history. Concerning the compilation of a #FinishList, in the words of Starsky and Hutch: “Do it!”

Alright, now it’s your turn; what will YOU commit to finishing this year?

(Great Scott! Two #BacktotheFuture references? That’s heavy!)

#HTFTS- To the left, to the left…

January 11, 2012 Leave a comment

(Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the very first #HTFTSGuest written by #hashhead and Herald De Paris Deputy Managing Editor Dr. Al Carlos Hernandez a.k.a. Dr. AC!)

 I was watching the #FiestaBowl on New Years, featuring Stanford and some other school that is not Cal. Great game in the beginning, but then our lights went out until the last few minutes of the game. When the lights came back on the field goal kicker, a Stanford red shirt freshman—which does not necessarily mean that he is a communist…unless he was from Cal—missed a field goal that could have won it by hooking it to the left (#anotherpoliticalreference). Big Luck and his Cardinal crew came back strong in overtime to give the kicker another chance to win it and cement his place in the history books. Well he did, and he didn’t; he missed…again, by hooking it left…again.

I know exactly how the young man feels, I sold a major screenplay once, but at the last minute the lead actor turned down the part. I was out 50 Large and my screenwriting career hooked not to the left, rather into the abyss; abject disappointment led me into other less Glam careers. I fear this young man is going to wrestle with this failure all of his life. This can strengthen him; this could ruin him; in either case this could cost him dates, or get him a reality show and he too could become a #celebutard. Looking on the bright side, it is better to fail at #Stanford than succeed in community college.

(JCH: Good call AC, and I agree: Better to build the Titanic and watch it sink than stick to designing rowboats!)

For more from Dr. AC, check out the Op Ed Page of www.heralddeparis.com

#HTFTS- Guess what…

January 9, 2012 Leave a comment

I have a surprise for you! As I implied in the last post—#bigthingspoppin—the year #2012 is about doing new, and bigger things and this is the very first #HTFTS that is meant to point you to another #HTFTS. This Wednesday January 11th, #Hashtagfairytales is doing something that has never been done before: #HTFTSGuest! This is going to be a short non-sequitir post in the style of the #HTFTS provided by a #hashhead who has encouraged me from the very beginning! Check in on Wednesday to find out who! 

This particular instance of doing something bigger is actually providing something smaller; because as Wednesdays surprise author says, “Less is always more!”

Categories: #HTFTS

#bigthingspoppin

January 6, 2012 5 comments

It’s a hard decision. Serious? Funny? Which way to go? This is the first #Hashtagfairytales post of 2012, the year the world is supposed to end according to the Mayan Calendar. On the one hand, if this is supposed to be the last year, we ought to get serious and focus on meaningful things, but on the other hand, who wants to get all Eeyore right before they’re about to die a horrible, fiery death? We need some Tigger up in this piece (#winniethepooh)! I don’t know what to do #hashheads. I feel like a Kardashian watching Jeopardy, or a Real World cast member who was given contraceptives; I’m just confused. I may not know what to do with this post, but this one this I do know: This is my year. I’m grabbing this year by the friggin’ horns, and I’ll show it who’s boss! #2012 you’re about to get got! I’m going to seize each day, and appreciate each one as well. If I were in prison with #2012 I would make it my…too far huh? I think you’re right.

According to the Mayan Calendar—which I can only assume is a Calendar that was developed by actress Maya Rudolph, poet Maya Angelou, and R&B singer Mỳa—the whole world is supposed to end in 350 days. 350 days? That’s it? That’s like 10 haircuts from Hamiltons Barbershop in Oakland, or 9 professional shaves from @TheArtofShaving, 3 occasions to by a HandsToGo personal massager for a friend (#greatproducts)! That’s 240 days of work, 50 sabbath days, 20 matinee movies (#giveortake)! Let me take this time to say that this all may sound a bit strange or dramatic, and I suppose it should. These aren’t things we think about are they? We take a haircut for granted as one of hundreds more we will have; we take a Sabbath day—a day of rest—not considering in what new way we ought to cherish them; we got to work and school thinking, “One day I’ll go elsewhere. I’ll accomplish those goals someday.” How dumb are we for that?! (#very)

I should say that I don’t believe in the Mayan Calendar prediction; I don’t think that the world will end December 21, 2012. The Ancient Mayans were like the #HaroldCamping of their day (What? Not a fan of the Harold Camping reference? Oh, I get it: he was SO 2011). But let’s just for a moment pretend that this is our last year on earth; use your imagination for just a moment. If this were your last year, what would you want to accomplish. I’ve made it clear already, I own this year! For #2012 my attitude is completely #bigthingspoppin and #littlethingsstoppin! But I don’t want that just for me, I want it for every #hashhead; for every casual reader of this blog; for you who just happened by, I want big things.

Friends, you must have goals. I’m not talking lame New Years resolutions that were broken by this past Wednesday, I mean real goals; you gotta have em! If not, go on and click that small orange box with the white “X” in the upper right corner; push your home button; hit end on your smart phone. Close out this page and don’t look back. If you have no goals and no dreams, this post—nay, this blog is probably not for you! This year, I will finish things I’ve started, and hell, I’ll start some things with plans to finish them! I’ll write about my inspiration for this and what is on my list at another date, this is just to let you all know: the best is yet to come. #Hashtagfairytales is going to be huge this year! I don’t say that with pride or some sort of blind hope, I say this in the full knowledge that I am dedicating myself to creating awesome content. I am dedicating myself to consistency. I am dedicating myself to plugging other sweet blogs like Tommy’s Blog, or Jessica Hitte’s, or Inner-City Eats, or one of those in the #Blogroll at the right of the screen, or one of those featured on the #Legit page. I’m dedicating myself to my desire!

My desire—my goal overall—for this year is to change my situation. This sounds cryptic and vague but let me assure you that it isn’t. It is general, and it is so for a very specific reason: I appreciate where I am; this appreciation is essential for #2012 to be #BA! I am glad to be: alive, living under a roof, not starving, educated, walking around with shoes, employed, loved, able of body, sound of mind, a child of God. This serves as the foundation for my year, but my situation; my exact position in all of these places could be changed. Yeah I’m educated, but I could have a higher degree. Sure I’m able bodied, but I could lose some weight (and of course by some I mean the combined weight of the Olsen twins). Granted, I’m employed, but not in my dream job. Of course I’m a child of God, but I could read my Bible and pray more! My situation could be improved.

I got the great opportunity to hang out with my grandmother the other day—and let me say that she is pretty much the coolest in the world; that must be true, it’s on the internet now. My grandmother is one of those people who keeps Christian Television on all day long (with exception of the times her soap operas are on; can’t miss the Young and the Restless—or #YR as it’s called). While I was at her house, three preachers came on: Joel Osteen (The smilin’ preacher), Brian Houston (Pastor of Hillsong Australia), and some guy who looked and preached like a ninja (if you assumed that he was Asian, you are racist…and correct).

Of these three, two mentioned my grandmothers favorite scripture: “Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us” Ephesians 3:20 (Cited in #KJV, cuz my grandmother brought me up on that version). I’m not like a pastor or a Christian school chancellor or anything, but going into this year, let’s think about this verse a little bit. Oh I am going to smoke #2012; I’ll leave it in the dust, and I believe you will too. But neither of us will do this on our own accord or because we are so great, but because of the power that worketh! I’m not trying to preach to you; who am I to preach to anyone else? But I will encourage the hell out of you! Finish that degree, leave that toxic relationship, get that license, make sure that place hires you, write that book, drop that hurtful habit, get closer to God, spend more time with your wife, start that business, become a real boy! I don’t know what your goals are, but I want to. I’ve got goals. You’ve got goals.

We can do it, we can make it, we will finish. We can do it, we can make it, we will finish.

Does this resonate with you or am I way off?

(Serious or funny? Screw that, I’m goin’ inspirational! In your face 2011 Jacob C. Howard! Pretty solid first episode of 2012!)

(Also, Happy New Year!)

(Also, I dare you to count the exclamation points in this post!!!)